Honor and Love Your Aging Parents

I want to begin this PR praising my Lovely Husband, telling Him how much I love Him and need Him. He is awesome and He still surprises me teaching me and bringing old teaching to my mind.

My mommy is living with me because she is a little depressed with my daddy’s death (two years last august) and she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. Sometimes she is ok and glad. But sometimes she is sad and she is very, very stubborn. When she is sad she does not want to eat and scratch the bruises she has in her arms and they do not heal. I confess it was driving me crazy and sometimes I argued with her.

I was feeling very tired because I need to change my routine because of her and sometimes she does not help me. Sometimes I wanted to cry and I even thought to work just half time. But He gently told asked me why I was not giving Him my mommy the same way I was giving Him my marriage and my husband. He showed me I was not giving Him my mommy and all decisions I need to take about her. He showed me all I need to do is to ask Him, have faith in Him and wait without looking to the circumstances.

Since yesterday I’m feeling well, calm and trusting Him my mommy. And doing this made me be more lovely and patient with my mommy. And He is giving me wisdom to take care of her. He is great!!! I love Him so much!

Thank You my Love for everything, for being my Husband and everything I need. Forgive me for everything I did wrong about my mommy. I love You and You are everything I want and need.

Matthew 21:22 (NIV) ”If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.”

2 Samuel 22:31(NIV) “As for God, his way is perfect: The Lord’s word is flawless; he shields all who take refuge in him.”

Psalm 37:3-7 (NIV) “Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him”

Philippians 4:6 (NIV) Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

~ Valentina in Brazil

From Erin: I’m so thankful that sweet Valentina humbly submitted this PR so we could also be reminded about asking the Lord for HIS help. More and more older parents are requiring help from their grown children and thankfully He’s sent me ahead on this journey too. It’s been 17 years since my mother (whom I cared for) passed away. And 22 years that my father (whom we kept out of nursing homes and hospitals too) left this world for the next.

What I want to tell everyone, even shout it (if that would be appropriate for a bride who is known by her “gentle and quiet spirit” 😉 is that no matter how childlike or dependent a parent is, we are still commanded to HONOR them in the same way we as wives hope that our husbands HONOR us and how we’ve chosen to honor our husbands, with respect and without arguing.

1 Peter 3:7—“You husbands likewise, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and grant her HONOR as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”

What I want to remind all of us is, “Love never fails” and “Love covers a multitude of sins” and frustrations. When I hear or see the roles reverse, when grown children who are caring for their aging parents become strict (with all sorts of “reasons” and excuses why this is the way they “must” treat them), I am heartbroken.

The first promise found in the Bible is in Exodus 20:12 AND in Ephesians 6:2 because God wanted to make sure we knew how important it was to “HONOR your father and mother”—which is the first commandment that a promise was added—“that it may go WELL with you and that you will live long on the earth.”

No, at times it’s difficult and honestly, sometimes it may feel impossible, especially when you can see what they are doing is putting them in danger. Yet, as we know as His brides, NOTHING, not one thing is impossible to do WITH God. So by asking your HH, as Valentina did, HE will show you the way to forgo being harsh, and instead shower your parent with LOVE. If you do, I promise it will make these difficult years some of the best years of your lives!

Also remember, YOUR children (and everyone since we are epistles) will be watching you, just as much as my own children watched me. All I can say is that both my parents, Grammy and Papa, are often spoken about because their memories are so cherished by all of us. We celebrate their birthdays each year and also speak of them, never with sadness or regrets, but in the fondest way.

Dear bride, there is no way I could have managed going through this valley, twice, choosing to care for my parents without my HH with me the entire time. Remember, He wants you to know “We are in this together” if you’ll only recognize you are not alone, weren’t meant to do anything alone, when all that it takes is “acknowledging” He’s right there with you.

Proverbs 3:5–6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways ACKNOWLEDGE Him, and HE will make your paths straight.”