It’s been quite a while since i met with Tara from the Ministry which i was very privileged to do so, and since becoming a translator, i was very grateful for the chance and the Lord leading them to have a fellowship with me because she became like Aaron for Moses as she held my hand through the storms i have gone through easily. I find peace and comfort knowing my other hand was being held by the Lord. =)
I had been on this RJ alone, with the Lord for the most times, because my contentiousness before had caused me to face even greater difficulties as a consequence of my disobedience to my Love. When i was at the moment of facing them, i felt losing hope and giving up but when i remember this is HIS plan and HIS way of strengthening my faith in Him, that i was the one who brought this circumstances in my life, i felt i still had to hold on and with someone holding up my hand for me when i grew tired, it gave me a rest for a while to resume on the journey i was about to continue on.
The past week has been very tough and everyone is coming against me, my faith and in what i believe in but somehow, i had peace inside knowing that HE never left my side through this ordeal. And somehow, He had blessed me in ways, in little details i did not expect.
I used to be anxious for the events, so i often read q&a about the holidays coming up and I fervently prayed to Him before to “please restore my marriage before our anniversary” and it came, it also passed. But the Lord prepared me and He had given me the verse from Revelations 21:4-6 on that specific day, “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” He said to me: “It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. To the thirsty I will give water without cost from the spring of the water of life.
The words that had stayed on my mind were, THERE WILL BE NO MORE CRYING OR PAIN, I AM MAKING EVERYTHING NEW, AND IT IS DONE. These are His promises that i will surely hold unto, and i surrendered to His will and prayed for Him to let me let go and have His will done in my life.
I backslide, i falter and i fail. I am ashamed of crying out to Him during these times but i know that is what i needed to do and what he wants me to, and HE always forgives me.
Now my birthday is tomorrow, and people, many people ask how am i doing, and i cant help but answer them with a smile. Everything may look hopeless, but since i have the Lord, i have all i need in my life, this is greatest gift to me and there would no place id rather be. What delights me most is that although people find it really hard to understand what i have and am feeling, when they notice the glow and peace i have, its the confirmation i mostly needed during trying times that whenever i feel weak, the Lord, my love, is always with me.
This is His promise to me. The old order of things, my OLD life has passed, and my birthday, this NEW YEAR that was given to me by the Lord, my love is another chance at life to live it well and according to His will. I know in this new year, one chapter of my old life will be closed as it opens to new beginnings, with Him at the center more than anything.