♕ Today's Promise: “Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness and speak tenderly to her.” Hosea 2:14
From ~ Petra in France
Hello Ladies, My journey started a year ago. I was a mean woman. I was controlling, self-righteous, know it all, manipulative, lying, arrogant, proud, depressed, insolent, humiliated EH (earthly husband) all the time, wanted to show off to people all the time, argumentative, contentious, thought I was the best Christian ever, Junior holy spirit, hypocrite, nosy. Believe me, you would not have wanted to come close to me.
I humiliated earthly husband constantly, I was toxic to him. I was always blackmailing him emotionally; I was controlling his whole life and mine. Controlling who we were to see and when, how we spent our money, I was … bad ladies. My house was filled with sadness, anger, shouts (from me, EH never reacted, he always tried to calm me down). Even in front of my baby, who thank God was really small. She is two today.
Well, I smashed down my house into pieces. That day, when I was throwing the final blow, EH (earthly husband) said he wanted a divorce, he never loved me like a wife, he was feeling forced to marry me because of the emotional bargain I pulled on him, he does not see me as a wife but as a sister or a friend, but he does not want to have anything to do with me.
Today, a year after it all started, I am happy because I am not who I used to be anymore. I know there is still a lot of work, but I learnt through this ministry to be quiet and gentle, nice, generous, submissive, to be considerate, to love people, not to defend myself. I have learnt to endure, to stop complaining, murmuring, I have seen myself grow. And people around noticed.
During that year, I have seen impossible and awful relationships. I messed up being wonderfully and miraculously restored. It is during this year that I met the LOVE of my life. Ladies, I know you know Him. He makes me feel like a woman, He loves me no matter what. He is the best that could have happened to me. He saved me from showing my daughter what I have witnessed as a child, a contentious woman in a poor marriage.
My Father is still shaping me, and believe me, there is a lot of work to do, but I am not who I used to be and for that … I sing praises and shout His name.
During that year He taught me to let go of my (false gods) baals, (carriers, marriage, earthly husband, desire of being a mom), and focus only on Him. Of course, there are tears, a lot of them. Because being on a narrow road is hard, but wow, I feel so much joy surrendering everything. I feel like I have been in rehab and replaced my destructive drugs with Him.
There is a season for everything. There was the season for me to let go of my church, my friends (Psalm 88:8), my family, my job and career, the daughter’s clothes that I was saving for another baby, my cycle app that I was obsessed with, my finances. He led me by far to do the hardest things I have ever done; He is asking me to step out of the boat and follow Him on the water.
At first, I was like a horse and He led me to do the right thing with a bridle. Now I am His bride, and I do the right thing out of love for Him and His word.
I finally embrace these verses in Matthew 10:37-39 : “Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it."
RMI 2021 promise could not be more accurate : “Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness and speak tenderly to her."
Well I start to enjoy my desert.
Praise the Lord.
“Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.” Matthew 10:37-39
“Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness and speak tenderly to her.” Hosea 2:14