My Mind Was at War

Today's Promise: “The Lord does not delay [as though He were unable to act] and is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is [extraordinarily] patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance.” 2 Peter 3:9-10

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☊ PRAISE from Liora

I'm praising my Heavenly Husband for showing me and convicting me when I was struggling. For the last month, I have had some really hard trials come my way within my family. I found myself wrestling, panicking, trying to fight off my flesh and in those instances my mind was at war. I was restless and I cried so much for a few days feeling offended by my loved ones and just wanting to become selfish again so that I would not hurt and feel the rejection and the pain. I felt like I had been doing so well for a while now and then it all came crashing down again one day. This is why we need to always stay alert… “Be sober [well balanced and self-disciplined], be alert and cautious at all times. That enemy of yours, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion [fiercely hungry], seeking someone to devour.” 1 Peter 5:8

The enemy tried to keep me in the pit of despair condemning me and telling me that I was still the same person because of my thoughts and because of me trying to fight off my flesh so desperately, and that I would never change, that the Lord would not bless me anymore because I was such a bad person still. As the enemy was tormenting my mind, The Lord was trying to get my attention to show me that I was trying to do things in my own strength and understanding again, trying to reason and figure things out on my own, and that is why I was struggling so much.

Days passed and I felt this heaviness and a sort of depression, but at the same time my Heavenly Husband was pushing through, speaking to me and trying to show me where I went wrong. I cried and repented and still felt I was wrestling a bit, but little by little the Lord was pulling me back out of the pit. He did it with such gentleness, love and patience. Slowly just bringing me back to rest with Him and speaking so softly to me His word and His truth.

I'm not going to lie, I struggled for days because I am sure He was trying to show me something, teach me some things through that fall, that trial. When I FINALLY grasped what He was telling me, He blessed me because that is His nature. Not because I deserved it, but because He is so good and wants to bless His Brides, He was just waiting for me to “GET IT”!

During this time of struggle, a couple in the family were upset at me. One of them would speak to me somewhat but not much, and the other one would not speak to me or come around me at all. I tried to think of things that I could say to make things better and I confess even at times thought of bad things to say because I felt offended. But I felt instructed by the Lord to just keep quiet, just keep being kind no matter what they said or did not say to me.

Yesterday I went over to my dad's house with some groceries to make hamburgers on the grill for everyone. When it was time to eat, my niece told everyone that the food was ready and to come and eat, I thought for sure they would not come out of the room. But I was wrong, the two that were mad at me, ignoring me and rejecting me for weeks now, started to come back around and talk to me kindly again as if nothing had ever happened in the past few months. I have to admit it was a little strange that they started to speak to me out of nowhere again but I know that my Heavenly Husband can change hearts in an instant.

If you struggle sometimes and believe that the Lord is upset with you for mistakes that you make and you start believing the lies that He does not want you anymore or that He will not bless you anymore because of your mistakes, you need to spend more time with Him so that You can feel and hear Him clearly. You know, God is not surprised about anything that you do. He already knew beforehand everything that happened and is going to happen. He wants your heart changed, and it is a process.

He does want us to come to repentance but knows that we're human and that we make mistakes. Acknowledge your mistakes, confess your sin to Him and ask for forgiveness and keep moving forward with Him. Don't move further away, don't run from Him again, I know that sometimes we fall and fail, but He is there waiting for you, to pick you back up and place you on the Rock. It's all a part of the plan, so keep walking with Him. Nothing that you ever do can separate you from the love of your Heavenly Father and your Heavenly Husband!

“The Lord does not delay [as though He were unable to act] and is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is [extraordinarily] patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance.” 2 Peter 3:9-10

“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” Romans 8:26

“Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.” 2 Corinthians 4:18

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