This Picture I Had in My Head…was Not True

♕ Today's Promise: "You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy." Psalm 30:11 NLT

It took me a few days to talk to my Heavenly Husband to be sure if I must submit this Praise Report or not. But the Lord showed me this was a prayer He answered when I desperately came to Him.

We start a new school year in January here in my country and my Former Husband let me know that he will be phoning the kids in the evening to find out how their day was. Now usually when he phones, he sends a message before-hand to ask if he can phone and then I would reply with yes and make sure I am in another room of the house so the children have privacy with him.

This evening he just phoned without asking and we were having dinner at the time. So the kids picked up the phone and I had nowhere to go. And this evening they were all talking on speakerphone. The children's stepmother and stepbrother included and joking and having fun because they were all away together for 3 weeks during the school holiday. It caught me off guard because my Heavenly Husband did not warn me or I may not have been close enough to Him to hear His voice.

I felt like the proverbial 5th wheel and it all left me totally defeated. I am not sure why specifically this night it bothered me so much but it did. Praise my Heavenly Husband, even though I felt like I did, I did not react. I just kept quiet and waited to be alone with Him. As soon as it was time to go to bed and I had some time with Him I just fell before Him and told Him "My Love I cannot do this anymore, I know when I am weak You are strong, but I have reached my limits and I need you" I fell asleep talking to Him.

For a few days I felt rotten inside and I was not a pleasure to be around. The kids went to their father again on the Friday as is the arrangement and came back the next morning. When he brings the children back we would sometimes discuss something surrounding the children but never anything else.

This morning he asked to talk to me and send the children inside. Naturally, I assumed I am in trouble again as this often happens and I was:) But after he spoke to me about what I did wrong, he said something. He said a lot of things but it all came down to he made the biggest mistake of his life and he does not know how to fix it. He has nothing because it all belongs to his wife so everything that gets paid in our divorce settlement is being paid by her. He only has what he took from our house when he left and because he works for his wife he would not even have an income when he leaves then he then told me that he loved me.

I could not believe what I was hearing because a while after he left he said he is not sure if he ever loved me and we were too young that we did not know what we were getting ourselves into and if he had met me later in life he would never have married me.

When I had time to talk to my Heavenly Husband again, I could not get out any words. I just cried on His shoulder. The Lord was showing me that this picture I had in my head of this perfect family was not true. He is so amazing in the way that He just comforts us sometimes when we least expect it He just swoops in and shows us that He is very much aware of our tears and He hears us when we cry out to Him.

I don't know what the future holds, but what I do know is that I am safe with Him. I can trust Him with everything and He will never fail me:):):)

“You lead me with your secret wisdom. And following you brings me into your brightness and glory!” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭73:24‬ ‭TPT

“So why would I fear the future? For your goodness and love pursue me all the days of my life. Then afterward, when my life is through, I’ll return to your glorious presence to be forever with you!” Psalms‬ ‭23:6‬ ‭TPT

~ Yvonne in South Africa
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Ministry Note: Not only did this take Yvonne by surprise, it also surprised me. Not because I don't expect to see restorations happen to our ministers, but because in the last few days He's had my mind on something that I believe many women miss in the course of their restoration.

So far Yvonne has done it all right—due primarily to her dependence and devotion to Him. And the primary step she's taken and lived by—truly living as His bride, really living as a Couple would—she and her HH is why and how she has arrived at this place in her journey.

It's now, in this new phase where so many women fail to continue to follow Him and instead revert back to a prior principle of letting go. This is the time, He reminded me recently, is when Yvonne's kind words (due to His love she drenches herself with daily) and Yvonne's patient listening ear (due to her gentle and quiet spirit), that will automatically allure her husband to return to his family and ultimately the Lord.

As it says in RYM "First to Throw the Stone" once your husband shows you that he feels he is able to trust you (because he knows that you are not going to try to make him come back to you, but that you have let him go) then it is time to allure him as it describes in the book of Hosea.

Seducing is very different from alluring. Kind and loving words are alluring. Forgiveness is alluring. Someone who is at peace is alluring. Don’t fail to allure your husband through kindness, with loving words, which speak loud and clear that you truly have forgiven him. “Therefore, behold, I will allure her, bring her into the wilderness, and speak kindly to her” (Hos. 2:14). Again, for a deeper understanding of the principle of alluring, you would do well to view the video “Alluring and Unconditional Love.”

Be excited when your husband calls or comes by. It’s not pursuing if you are excited. Let your EH know by the excitement, enthusiasm, and the tone of your voice that he is special and very loved by you. However, if you have never let him go, it will drive him away. You must first be sure he knows that you have truly let him go, then begin to allure him with your kind words."

This last sentence, "However..." is where the error lies in the majority of brides. Most brides who never experience restoration are due to not letting go. They never let go, so they are never able to properly allure, just being kind and forgiving the past. Without letting go, the kindness extended is again met with harshness and the hate-wall begins to be built up again.

Our Beloved reminded me that our ministry’s push and its message has sadly been all about letting go and far less emphasis on what happens after properly letting go. Kind, lovely responses are alluring, dear brides. Loving words, a gentle and quiet spirit is Alluring to everyone. Strangers, former or wayward spouses and to children. I'm excited to watch how Yvonne's journey unfolds so that we can focus on the positive and powerful results of having the Love of your Life guiding your every step while protecting your emotions.



? Ministry Announcement ?

To Celebrate 30 Years of Ministry, RMI, and her partners, are unveiling a new addition to our blogs—allowing you to LISTEN ☊ to Restored Marriage Testimonies, praise reports, journals, and thank you notes!! These will be read by the author and/or be narrated by one of our Ministry Team Members and amazing Translators, Proofreaders, and Narrators.

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