Thought I was Over it Already

This praise started a while ago while I was doing the Living the Abundant Life Lesson: Chapter 14 “You’re Beautiful!!“! I never really wanted to admit to myself how inferior I felt because of my husband leaving me for another woman, but the Lord opened my eyes to it so I can heal.

One day my girl wanted to know if she can ask me a question that may hurt me. What she asked was surprising and now that I think back a little funny:) She wanted to know from me why when she talks about her stepmom I always make a face and when she talks about me to her stepmom she also makes a face. LOL, I did not even realize I was making a face. 

I apologized to her and told her that I know her stepmom takes very good care of them so there is really no reason for me to make a face, but my heart was not in it. After that, I ran to my Heavenly Husband and told Him what just happened and how sorry I am and can He please change my heart! And I confessed this sin to my friend so she can pray with me.

James 5:16 (NIV) “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”

So, I did what I could, now the rest would be up to Him! I know I cannot change my own heart, so I waited patiently. Then Saturday morning I get woken up by a phone call. My FH telling me that my son is ill and he wants to come home. My FH is busy, he cannot bring him, but his wife is coming.

Up to that day, I have not spoken more than 10 words with her. So here she is dropping off my child and I am saying Love, whatever You need to do, You need to do now! 

Of course how faithful He always is. When they arrived she got out we discussed my son and she said goodbye and left and as she drove away for the first time, it really sank in, she is just another person. She is a mother, she is a wife, she is working hard and she is doing her best to get through every day. 

I felt blessed because I had a relationship with my Heavenly Husband that she will never have with an earthly husband and as I walked away I said, my Dear, please show her Your love! 

Sometimes you have things in your heart that you are not even willing to confess to yourself let alone other people. I really thought I was over it already. Isn’t it just great that we have the most amazing Husband that knows us inside out and so lovingly shows us the truth of it all! 

Proverbs 4:23 (TPT) So above all, guard the affections of your heart, for they affect all that you are. Pay attention to the welfare of your innermost being, for from there flows the wellspring of life.

I know this verse by heart and think of it often and when my daughter asked me the question, this was this first verse that came to mind.

Yvonne in South Africa
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