Right now, i am at that point in my life when i was being tested for obedience to the Lord. Ever since i came to this ministry, i have idolized my marriage and my restoration and longed for my husband. I even felt i loved my husband now that he is gone more than when he was with me, i tried everything that RMI says but still was walking by sight instead of faith. I just realized recently that there is nothing more i want that to have my marriage with the Lord restored and to become worthy of being his bride because He is the most rightful one who deserves all the love i can give.
In Chapter 1 “What Is the Abundant Life?” like Michele, i prayed fervently and never cease asking the Lord for my husband’s change of heart and marriage restoration. The more i prayed, the more my husband turned far from me. It suddenly struck me today that i was supposed to put the Lord, my HH, above anything and everyone else. It was like committing in an adulterous relationship wherein my love for my husband is like a chord of sin that is still binding him to me, hindering me from restoration. It is so hard and painful to let go, even in prayers. I feel as if I’m dying emotionally, and realizing this, this might be the same attachment my husband has with his OW. i cannot do this on my own and i ask my Lord, my HH, to place it in my heart to trust and love him the way i am supposed to.
The experienced that seemed so real to me was the fact that i associated my fanaticism and idolization for my marriage restoration and the love i have for my FH with his relationship with his OW. it felt so real, it is very painful and it’s hard to let go. It was like there were some chords on where i should go (to the Lord) but something is holding me (cords of sin) and that is my love for my husband when i was supposed to let go completely. I always pray to the Lord but in my prayers i want my HH to work with me instead of me working with Him and just trusting Him, the way i trusted my FH for everything that i needed before.
Last night, i came to surrender everything to Him, even my marriage restoration.
I will heed the wisdom of Michele. I will say and continue saying my HH is all I need and everything that i needed in my life until my words become true in my mind and in my heart. I ask Him to put this kind of love in me, to guide me where He wants me to be and how He wants me to be.
Dear brides, i know, most of you like me, struggle hard with this concept of finding the abundant life because we all knew we had to fully let go. We all came to this ministry together with the same purpose of having our marriages restored and yet what this would teach us to completely let go of what we are fervently praying and seeking for all this time. I know it’s really hard sisters, in fact, it is even painful to let go of what you think and feel is your happiness but we have to trust the Lord in this journey we are going through right now. There’s no other way around, there is no going back. We are all led here for a reason and that reason, we have to be joyful for, is because our Lord and Saviour, now our Heavenly Husband, longs to be dear and close to us. Only a few people were chosen for this call and although we might not be grateful for our current circumstance, we can find Joy in knowing that the Lord had chosen us to live with Him in this abundant life He promised.
Dear Brides, your future awaits. You are here today for a very special calling by the Lord and He wants and longs to be close to you. Are you ready?
I encourage all the hurting women like me who long for their EH and their marriage restored to read this book. I guarantee, it will be painful because you will be asked to fully let go of something you came to this ministry for. But we must abide in order to obtain the abundant life that God had promised us. There is no turning back, although in these situations we are currently facing right now, what choice do we have? Our husbands are already far away from us, and we are hurting each and every moment that we are not spending time with him. It’s about time to find joy and peace beyond understanding and by getting ahold of this book, it will teach us how to find Him and the Abundant Life.