♕Today's Promise: "Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.” 1 Corinthians 6:18
Sabrina, how did your Restoration Journey actually begin?
Hello and may God bless you with the desires of your heart as you begin to follow the Lord and His plan for your life.
My name is Sabrina and I'm 43 yrs old and I have 4 grown children. What brought me here to this ministry was because God saw my heart that was full of sorrow and hurts. However, through my separation, which led to divorce (and I was the one who filed the divorce), my heart bled for years and I could not understand it. But I ended up back with my former husband, Charles after all those years of separation, because I began to follow His ways. It was then God started my Restoration Journey and I began my journey.
I always had in my heart that I wanted to marry someday, but, I never knew that I actually would. When I met Charles I knew there was something special about him. I had always been very shy when I dated, but not with him. We began dating and Charles surprised me one day by making a statement saying, "You are going to be my wife.” I knew there was something about him, but marriage wasn't what I had in mind and from my expression he knew it too. As we were dating, GOD started dealing with us in regards to Intimacy, since we were not married. We started reading a book that "scared us straight" and we quickly married and began going to church.
After 3 years we started having troubles and I became contentious. I constantly started asking him to leave and also began shaming him by my words, which resulted in him becoming distant. I just didn’t care anymore! Satan had a field day with me and boy did I suffer because of it! You guessed it! Charles just up and left me. We were separated for 5 years and after 3 ½ years, I wanted a divorce, even though a "still small voice" was telling me not too. But because I was rebellious, I went through with the divorce that Charles never wanted. Afterwards like most of you, I felt empty and lonely, so I began dating a married man (who was at the time separated) thinking it was going to help me to get Charles out of my heart and off my mind. But GUESS WHAT???? It didn't.
How did God change your situation, Sabrina, as you sought Him wholeheartedly?
I can honestly tell you that I really don't know how I ended up here at RMIEW, but thank God I did. This ministry has brought me such a long way and has showed me so many things I never knew about. It's a wonderful place to be and to grow in the Lord and experience Him, believe me I know!
Now over the years I always told God I wished He would fix my marriage, and wanted to know why I could not get Charles out of my heart. This is something I just couldn't understand. I cried for so long and then soon after coming here I ran into him. I found out he was involved with someone else and had been with this woman for 4 and a half years (she was married but separated from her husband).
After seeing him, I realize I wanted my marriage back and then stopped messing with the man I was with. Charles, on the other hand, was still involve with the other woman so it looked pretty hopeless. As I said, I guess I always wanted my marriage and felt that it was hopeless until I ran across your ministry. I quickly read Erin's book How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage and boy did this show me so many things about myself and what I could finally admit, that the marriage mess was my fault. I felt so hurt because of my past actions. But reading Erin's testimonies and all the others made me wonder and feel hopeful that possibly mine could be restored too.
Soon God began helping me a lot, but I realized I needed someone to be there to guide me. I knew it would not be easy. Soon after I changed, I began to see my ex and talk to him, but knew this was not enough. I wanted to see God move just like he moved in Erin's situation and everyone else's. When I filled out my questionnaire I ended it with: Please help me.
Thankfully I never went to counseling, so I didn't make mistakes like that. Friday, December 23, was a big turning point for me, it's when I decided I needed to begin helping other woman, and I filled out the Minister in Training Evaluation so I knew what I would need to learn to help women in crisis.
What principles, from God's Word (or through our resources), Sabrina, did the Lord teach you during this trial?
RMI has meant so much to me. When I applied to become a Minister and enrolled into RMIOU, I said:
My heart is so still so overwhelmed because of things I have learn about myself. It has made such a difference in me, because I didn't know I was carrying all this stuff. It's been a challenge but what you all mean to me, words can't express. You all have helped me to see what God has probably been trying to show me but I couldn't sit still long enough to listen. You showed me it's not all about me and my marriage being restored, but it's more about helping others— thank you so much!
The reason I am interested in becoming a MITC "Minister in Training Candidate" is that even though I never thought of being a minister, I know I can encourage other women very well, even when I can't encourage myself. There have been many people who tell me that I needed to be a minister, but I thought "No, not me." But I really enjoyed just lifting people up, you know, it made me feel better when I did.
NOW, after being here almost a month, and going through your first course, I now want to be what GOD wants me to be, and if it's being a minister, wow, it will be such a joy to know you made a difference in one person life—that's joy!
When Jesus healed the ten lepers and only one came back, it make me look at myself. I want to be the one who came back and made the difference.
What were the most difficult times that God helped you through, Sabrina?
Now I need to confess that with all of this I tripped up! Charles continued to come to see me after seeing the changes in me, and we continued to see each other but against scripture, we started having sexual relations even though we were #divorced. Deep down inside I knew it was wrong, which only led Charles to be confused between me and the other women. Then he left me again after 3 months after he had promised we would marry. I was devastated.
Surprisingly, this time I was okay, and knew I just needed more time with the LORD. I went through storm after storm, but God was always with me. I confessed my involvement with my FH to the RMIEW leaders, and I was immediately set free from guilt. Then I began to move forward and put all my focus on the Lord—completely letting go of Charles. I kept my mouth quiet, fasted and constantly prayed to be closer to Him. That's when He helped me learn to depend on Him and Him alone.
It was at this time that I wanted even more to help other women with marital issues because I didn't want anyone to feel the way I was feeling. I wanted to share the peace I received after I finally put God first in my life and began seeking Him alone; not Charles or my children. I started trusting Him in everything because He wanted so much to be part of every situation in my life (as well as yours).
Sabrina, what was the turning point” of your restoration?
The turning point came when my Charles and I began dating again but I also found out about the OW, that she was still in his life. I cried like never before to GOD, pouring my heart out to Him. I started talking to GOD and I told Him how I was feeling (not anyone else) and that I wasn't going to stop crying out to Him until He helped me.
Tell us HOW it happened, Sabrina? Did Charles just walk in the front door? Sabrina, did you suspect or could you tell you were close to being restored?
Ladies, God is AWESOME! I first would like to thank God for what He is doing in my life and KNOW this; I had nothing to do with this. NOTHING!
On March 8th, my marriage was restored! YES it really was! MINE! I was remarried on March 8th and believe it or not. Just before we remarried, Charles began opening up his heart to me and spending time with me but this time without us being intimate—I just couldn’t believe he wanted to wait too. WOW! God knows how to turn things around!!!
Charles even apologized and confessed that he never wanted to leave me. I can’t express enough how long I was not ready for all of this and why I asked the Lord if it is His will and He if wanted us to be remarried, then have Charles ask me again—and to my amazement—he did!
Yes, I still have a lot of work to do, but my GOD has got me. Ladies God is AWESOME and He is all we need.
Would you recommend any of our resources in particular that helped you, Sabrina?
As I said before, He first led me to find Restore Marriage Ministries and I knew it was GOD’s will to restore my marriage after I saw the heading “How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage." I ordered the book and discovered God’s principles, and I learned how I had violated so many of them, which brought me to my KNEES. I immediately asked God to forgive me and went to all five of my children and confessed my faults instead of my husband’s faults as I had done in the past. Then I was led to contact my former husband and apologize for everything. HE said that he had forgiven me a long time ago.
Would you be interested in helping encourage other women, Sabrina?
Yes
Either way, Sabrina, what kind of encouragement would you like to leave women with, in conclusion?
Dear friend, never think the Lord doesn't hear your cries, He does. We can't help, but God is faithful in every area you need Him in. You see, this is why you are here now because He's heard you cry. Be ready to grow and know that everyone in this ministry loves and cares for you.
Be Blessed.
