He is My Provider

I have surrendered to Him all my financial needs. This is one area in my life that I truly ever really super TRUST Him. He has been faithful in providing for me, even using my EH to do so. I do not ask anything from my EH but instead I thank Him that I know He will supply all my needs.

After the separation, praise God my EH still shouldered the rent. But it meant that I now have to shoulder all of the bills. Since it’s summer, my electrcity bill for the past two months have been really high. It was way more than our monthly average.

I praise Him because my paycheck was able to cover all the bills, groceries, pet’s foods. Everything that I need for the whole month. I never lacked anything, I was still able to give my tithe first.. Give to everyone He leads me to give financially. I was able to save as well! I have more than enough!

Today, my EH called and asked about how I’m able to pay for the bills, all of my expenses. Then he went on to say that he felt guilty for not providing the way he used to. That he was earning a lot, he was spoiling the OW and yet only paid for my rent. For not giving me extra spending money. He kept on apologising. I told him it’s okay and I understand our situation.

He then remembered how I supported him when he was not earning anything. Yet, the OW does not give him anything. Not that he was expecting anything in return, but he was comparing me with the OW. He even mentioned that he knows I love him more than the OW loves him.

Then finally he asked how much I need for this month, how much was the monthly budget we had before. That moving forward he will pay for all of the bills and rent. Add a little extra for our pet’s needs. He really felt sorry that I had to suffer financially because his heart was too hard back then and now he said from his own words “like a blindfold has been removed. My eyes were opened”. He said he is still confused, his heart is 50/50.. But everyday he is realising a lot of things. He kept on mentioning “my mind is telling me this” I just know it is God speaking to him.

I was just praising and thanking Him while he was saying all those things. For using my EH to continue to provide for me. For speaking to Him, for opening his eyes. I was whispering but my voice was shouting deep inside.

A lot had happened this month. I can’t share everything but My Love has been with me the whole time. Shielding my heart everytime my EH “asks” for time to speak with me. He gave me a gentle and quiet spirit as my EH shares his struggles and worries about his life decisions.

Everything I have comes from Him. Truly God is the God of impossible. I know He is working on my behalf. All I need to do is rest with my Love and not to worry about a thing.