♕Today's Promise: “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1T516
Jada, how did your Restoration Journey actually begin?
First of all let me apologize for not submitting my testimony. I honestly didn't think I was restored. It's been a year since my husband, Ronald, came home but it didn't look like restoration in my eyes, forgive me Lord for not giving you the praise you deserve.
So my restoration journey began when I saw a hickey on Ronald’s neck! I was terrified and felt such pain in my chest. I knew that God can restore marriages, but I just wanted at that moment an instant miracle from God because I didn't want to wait. I just wanted the pain of betrayal to go away. I tried everything in my effort to fix my marriage, but the more I tried the more Ronald pulled away from me. I spoke to everyone about him. I have sown seeds at church on behalf of my marriage, I fasted, but Ronald grew worse. In the beginning of our marraige he was always the one to initiate intimacy but as time went by I was the one begging for love and affection until one day Ronald told me he didn't love me anymore as a wife, just as a friend. He told me that he made a mistake in marrying me. He told me we weren't meant to be together. He also told me that he couldn't be intimate with me because he wasn't attracted to me and that he wouldn't sleep with me anymore in the same bed because it was unfair towards me as he was not treating me the way a husband should treat a wife.
I cried to him, I became a beggar. I begged him to give our marriage a chance because I know God can fix it. I hung on to him begging him please not to leave me. I searched his phone and called him all the time to the point he stopped answering my calls. I knew he was with the other woman whenever he didn't answer my calls. I also made the mistake of contacting the other woman which was a big mistake she told me things that really broke my heart and left me feeling hopeless like there was no way out of the mess my marriage was in.
Ronald was working far away from our home and so I only saw him once per month until he completely stopped coming home. When he would come home, I searched his phone and became more contentious. What I saw really broke my heart, I saw pictures of him and other women and at that time I was praying and searching for help for my marriage. I cried and asked Ronald to go for counseling with me, but he wasn't interested so I knew the fight for my marriage was only me and God. I sought help on my own and was advised by one of my pastors to show Ronald tough love. A pastor's wife told me to stop having intimacy with him and another advised me to separate and get a divorce because Ronald was the wrong person for me and we shouldn't have gotten married.
All these advise left me hopeless and thinking these are spiritual leaders they know more than I do so how could God heal a broken marraige that wasn't His will in the beginning? In addition to all of that my husband grew more distant and my marriage became more lifeless. After searching for help from people which didn't work out the day before I found RMI I sowed a seed on behalf of my marriage for God's help in my marriage and God answered my prayers by allowing me to find RMI the next day. I was on YouTube watching different marriage restoration testimonies when I came across a testimony from RMI and in the description it said hopeatlast.com.
At that moment I knew that this was my answer to my prayers. Then I searched online and found RMI where it says Divine Appointment I knew my prayers were answered. As I filled out the questionnaire and read the book How God Can And Will Restore Your Marriage, the Holy Spirit started revealing to me the person I was. I never knew I was contentious. I thought I was right for arguing and tossing Ronald’s phone outside smashing it to pieces. I thought I was right for screaming and crying and doing things my way. I saw how talkative I was criticizing and gossiping about everyone. I was a pharisee a big hypocrite. I started desiring to change and become like the ladies in the restored testimonies in love with their Heavenly Husband and gentle and quiet. I started taking the courses, journaling, playing love songs and practicing all that RMI tought me.
How did God change your situation, Jada, as you sought Him wholeheartedly?
As I mentioned before that before I found RMI I was seeking help as I was determined to fight for my marriage because I was a stander. Little did I know that I was standing in the way of my restoration. I searched for restoration testimonies and came across a marriage restoration testimony on YouTube that led me to hopeatlast.com and that's when I found RMI and I started applying the principles.
What principles, from God's Word (or through our resources), did the Lord teach you during this trial, Jada?
I have learnt many principles from God's Word to be gentle and quiet, to be humble, contented, to be submissive, win without a word. I've learnt to forgive, to love to tithe to my storehouse getting out of my earthly husband’s way and the hardest principle of all to apply was letting go. It was hard for me to let go but my Heavenly Husband carried me through and I did.
What were the most difficult times that God helped you through, Jada?
There were many difficult times that God helped me through. The first most difficult times God helped me through was seeing the hickey on Ronald’s neck. Having to listen to him talk to the other woman on the phone. The times when I would call his phone and it was turned off for days, the times when I didn't hear from him, the times when he would come by only for a few minutes after not seeing him for an entire month and just turned and left me. The hardest was seeing him stone cold towards me. I really didn't know what to do to help my marriage.
The hardest part that my Heavenly Husband helped me through was when Ronald told me I should move on with my life because he had moved on and he's happy, yes he told me there was someone else and when I tried to speak to him about what God said about marriages and adultery the person that answered was not the husband I knew. The last hardest times God brought me through was seeing Ronald happy without me and it didn't bother him whether he was living a right or wrong life before God. These were times I thought I was at a loss, because, I stopped smiling my whole world stopped I didn't know how to live or be happy anymore. My life was a mess.
Jada, what was the “turning point” of your restoration?
The turning point was when I started tithing to my storehouse accompanied by being contented and happy without restoration, I have done the abundant life course and I finally was moving on and being happy with just the Lord. Praying, praising and singing love songs to my Heavenly Husband. After making my list of good things to be happy for if God didn't restore my earthly marriage, I became truly contented without a earthly husband. That's when Ronald got a transfer from the department he was in to a different department in the police force that allowed him to be home more often.
Tell us HOW it happened, Jada? Did Ronald just walk in the front door? Jada, did you suspect or could you tell you were close to being restored?
Ronald got a transfer and he started spending more time at home when he first came I knew he was supposed to be on leave but I thought his stay was only for a few days just like usual so I paid no mind to it I thought he was just here for a few days. He soon would be on his way again. But He stayed and during the time I thought his stay was just for a time. Ronald, who told me he didn't love me, he wasn't attracted to me, I was not the woman for him and that he couldn't be intimate with me because he had no feelings for me. Yes my husband who said these words were intimate with me and God blessed us with a beautiful baby girl.
I started having dreams that he came home and we were together again in those dreams, I sort of suspected it but I wasn't sure because everything started going wrong for me so that gave me an idea that restoration was close.
Would you recommend any of our resources in particular that helped you, Jada?
I would recommend all of RMI courses, the books and the Abundant Life Courses. These were what helped me.
Would you be interested in helping encourage other women, Jada?
Yes
Either way, Jada, what kind of encouragement would you like to leave women with, in conclusion?
This ministry has God in it and I certainly want to encourage you to cling to the Lord. Give Him your marriage and He will do the impossible and restore your marriage too just like He restored mine.
