RESTORED Marriage Testimony: “Pain and Rejection Almost became Unbearable”

☊ RMT Audio

Nia, how did your restoration actually begin?

There is so much joy in my heart right now! God kept His promise and changed my life.

I was separated for just a little over a year soon after I discovered my husband had cheated on me and my husband left the next month when I told him he had to choose me or her. There was so much pain and suffering in those early days. I did not forgive him for what he did and the hurt only increased because I chose not to forgive him. 

A month later, praise God, I was invited to join a group of women who were studying A Wise Woman. What a unique and life-changing moment in my life! Reading a WW made me see the value of the family and reflect on my role as wife, who during the nine years of my house I was completely foolish and gave the enemy several loopholes to steal and destroy my family. I tore my own house down besides never building it on the Rock. I had no idea what God said about anything but I began to learn.

When I finally told the women in the group that my husband had left, one woman smiled and said she was married to a Prodigal too and told me about the standers ministry she was part of. I began reading how to get my husband back but that's when so many horrible things began to happen. After that, many bad situations and one of the worst was when my husband told me that the "church" hurt me because I was having a false hope that nothing would make him come home, to me or to our daughters. He told me to leave him alone and told me he was thinking of remarrying the OW that I later read in a lesson is what happens when you don’t let go.

How did God change your situation, Nia, as you sought Him wholeheartedly? 

God always tried to talk to me through my sisters in the church and the several standers groups I attended, but as I listened to them and I believed that I could change him and make him want me again, the pain and rejection almost became unbearable.

At the end of the summer, when I was almost out of all hope and strength to fight for my marriage, I said a prayer on Sunday asking God for a sign whether or not I was going to continue this fight, why I couldn't continue to be so humiliated anymore. On Wednesday, at the women's service, a sister approached me and said she would email me a book she had received from a friend, and she believed that the book could give me strategies on how I could fight for the restoration of my family. OH GLORY!!!! At that moment a shock surged through me. I just knew it was God's answer to my prayer. She sent me Erin's book, How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage and my God my life changed. 

God spoke to me so much through that book. I discovered that I had lost my husband because I was so contentious, silly, quarrelsome, did not please Him, and mainly did not seek the Lord with all my heart. Then I pushed my husband away, made him hate me and despise me and be forced to treat me badly because I would not let go! From then on, I started looking for my HH only, I began being intimate with Him as my Husband and letting myself be transformed by His Love!

What principles, from God's Word (or through our resources), Nia, did the Lord teach you during this trial? 

God showed me a lot through His Word. I searched for His Word every day, through the daily reading of the Bible. I bought the recommended Scourby app and read through the Bible for the first time in my life and challenged the women in my former standers group to do the same. I also bought a bunch of RYM books and left them with the paperback at the end of my last group meeting. I read the Psalms everyday and was running to Him at the moment I felt even the slightest pain or fear. When my HH was all I wanted and needed I was able to fully let my husband go (I stopped contacting him right away and got off all social media). My time was spent searching for more of the Lord, tirelessly reading everything on your website and reread the book, How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage, dozens of times.

What were the most difficult times that God helped you through, Nia?

The Lord helped me to rid myself of all the anguish that was in my heart. He filled my heart with His peace so that I would not suffer from the circumstances and so I could learn to trust Him always.

Nia, what was the “turning point” of your restoration?  

The turning point of our restoration was when I let go of every single situation and handed it over to God. I spoke to my HH and I surrendered everything to Him and let Him control everything in my life.

Tell us HOW it happened, Nia? Did your husband just walk in the front door? Nia, did you suspect or could you tell you were close to being restored? 

A friend of his from the church (we had once attended as a couple) got to know my husband and decided to befriend him. One day he asked my husband if he wanted to attend a men's retreat and my husband accepted the invitation. The women were also having a retreat at the same time and I also decided to go. I had let go of attending church, but a friend asked me to come to support her because she was sharing her testimony. So I went for her, not for me.

At the luncheon I saw him and he saw me. I was shocked when my husband walked over, sat down, and began crying asking for my forgiveness. I said, “Of course, and hope you will forgive me.”

During our conversation he said he would never leave us again, and from that day, our house would serve the Lord. He said he hoped to be the spiritual leader of our home and that our life and family would belong to the Lord. We left and drove home in his car. I had come with my friend :). That day we spent the rest of the time with our daughters as a real family! 

Since coming home, God has been helping us to align everything according to His Word.

Would you recommend any of our resources in particular that helped you, Nia?

I recommend the book, How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage, and the courses on your website. This daily spiritual feeding strengthens us a lot and gives us the wisdom to continue these spiritual struggles. I also purchased the WOTT packet so I could mark and study the testimonies to be able to overcome the wicked that was coming against my mind.

Would you be interested in helping encourage other women, Nia? 

Yes, I am very interested in helping other women who are going through what I went through. I am already encouraging a close friend who I believe will soon receive her miracle and her family will be serving the Lord too.

Either way, Nia, what kind of encouragement would you like to leave women with, in conclusion?

Beloved brides, believe in the Word and His promises. Seek Him (not your husband) with all your heart, surrender your heartache, bad situations, even your lack of faith to Him and let Him fill you with peace and His Love. Believe His Word, because as Erin says, "you must believe that 'all things [can] work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose'” Romans 8:28. 

Continue your journey holding His hand, because God says, "But whoever endures to the end, he will be saved" Matthew 24:13. I challenge you to read through the Bible to be filled with hope through His Word. Reading the Bible will heal you, His promises will redeem your mind from lies. Be sure to "Rejoice in hope, be patient in the tribulation, persevere in prayer" Romans 12:12 and the more He will do on your behalf.

Your marriage will be restored because "Blessed is the man who suffers temptation; because when he is tried, he will receive the crown of life, which the Lord has promised to those who love Him" James 1:12. Let's all shout, "Amen!!"

Find more encouragement and overcome the hurdle of #Letting Go and #Contentious Woman by clicking on the #TAG linked to Restored Marriage Testimonies.

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