♕Today's Promise: “Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke?” Isaiah 58:6
Kenisha, how did your Restoration Journey actually begin?
I praise the Great Name of my Lord who without deserving it has saved me. I glorify the Great Lord God almighty for sending His Son to die for me so that today I could enter the most holy place of His presence. Wow how good and great is Jehovah. I was dirty, sunk in the depths of sin and even there being Holy He went and rescued me. They were 8 very difficult months but very good and blessed, yes because I was purified, washed, sanctified, healed. The Lord seduced me, I was seduced. He was stronger than me and defeated me. That force of breaking me with his love was what made me fall with love and captivated in His arms. I fell in love with Him like a teenage girl who finds love for the first time, it's all I want. I love it too much.
It all started when after 7 difficult months with my husband, many fights, contentions, one of the worst sins on my part, I was an adulteress, used pornography, masturbation, cursed. Everyone's enemy because of my bad attitude, rebellious with my bosses. I did not respect anyone or my husband Jackson and God did not exist in my days. It was at that moment when God took Jackson out of the house to get my attention since in the previous 7 months I did not pay attention to the voice of God who spoke to me through people and I paid no attention. I was so weak that after God removed Jackson from home, I got fully involved with another man.
After having been so spiritually dead, the Lord I imagined was already tired and very angry with my disobedience. He had so much to give me and I refused to receive it. His Holy Spirit visited me that day in my room, being alone, and He clearly said: pray for your marriage, and something in me woke up, I immediately decided to make prayer time every day at 3:00 am for my husband and marriage, it was there that He removed from me the desire of the life of sin that I lived and something new in me felt that it was born.
Already physically and mentally exhausted since I was fighting a spiritual war in a bad way, rebuking demons as I had seen them do in Protestant churches, this is when I fell asleep and told him, Lord, I can't anymore. I'm not praying the right way. It was then that He began to guide me and a few days later I discovered what breaks me to allow me to enter the process of restoring my soul. I discovered that Jackson had gone to live with the OW (other woman) with whom he was expecting a child, blessed be God because HE knew that only that was going to break my pride and my harassed heart, that's when I found RMI (Restore Ministries International) broken a few days later.
It was all brokenness, cleansing of my soul. I learned to fast, I ate the book How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage, I started to read the bible, to leave everything that was not holy. I started to make room in my heart for the Lord to take his place. I began to learn to let go of Jackson. God healed me of polycystic ovaries. I had heavy bleeding throughout the month which was healed by the wounds of my Lord. I also started tithing, my relationship was restored with Jackson after I apologized for how foolish I was.
My menstrual cycles were restored. For a long time I had to take pills to be able to see my periods, I also began to find him as my Heavenly Husband, I began to apply ALL the principles found in the book A Wise Woman. It also began to heal my heart, I learned to forgive the OW, my husband, and praise God for the babygirl that came from Jackson.
I found the Lord as my Heavenly Husband, my intimacy with Jackson was restored. My relationship with my sisters was restored. My intense search for the fullness of his Holy Spirit and deep intimacy in communion each day with the Holy Spirit continued and personal restoration when my relationship with my parents was restored.
I want to share that during all this time while the Lord did all this work in me, I invested my time sharing Him with other women, in my work I have not stopped sharing Him, which has caused many lives to be changed, also I not only prayed for myself and for my marriage restoration, I also spent my time fasting and praying for the salvation of my family, Jacksons family, my colleagues at work, my neighbors. This moved me quickly to where the Lord wanted me, which allowed my self to die, that the desire that only my needs were met would die and thus my selfishness would die. I kept tithing to my storehouse RMI, and applying all the biblical principles.
How did God change your situation, Kenisha, as you sought Him wholeheartedly?
Everything changed when I was restored personally, when my whole heart was cleansed and every broken relationship in my life was restored, when the Lord made sure that my life belonged to Him completely, that was when He began to change the course of my life, my husband and my marriage.
What principles, from God's Word (or through our resources), did the Lord teach you during this trial, Kenisha?
Tithing to my storehouse RMI, seeking the Lord 3 times a day, applying biblical principles, renewing my mind with the word, praying, fasting.
What were the most difficult times that God helped you through, Kenisha?
The most difficult moments were having to learn to love a hard heart, having to shut up and not defend, just trust that HE would defend me. Having to face the comments of all the people saying negative comments about Jackson because of what he posted on social networks.
Kenisha, what was the “turning point” of your restoration?
The crucial moment was when I fell for Him, when I knew that only He could change my situation and not with my own strength.
Tell us HOW it happened, Kenisha? Did Jackson just walk in the front door? Kenisha, did you suspect or could you tell you were close to being restored?
A few days after God restored my last broken relationship and when He was very sure that my heart was totally His, I received a message from Jackson asking if he could stay home that night, (I never imagined that he had reached the maximum point of hell that he lived with the OW because she turned into bitter wormwood) I did not ask for details I just answered with a lot of love as I always did when he contacted me that this was his house. He arrived later and we slept as spouses although he was very sad.
I kept crying, I kept fasting for the Lord Isaiah 58:6 to untie all bonds of impiety, break all yoke of sin and leave free from all the enemy’s oppression. I did not ask questions, I kept quiet in peace, I only spoke to him as always with love when he requested it or it was necessary, with a lot of peace.
They were very difficult days in which I only put unconditional love into practice, being quiet, which I have practiced since I learned to win without a word, with a soft and gentle spirit. It was three weeks where the Lord allowed Jackson to see the changes in me. I made him his dinner, breakfast. I treated him like the wife he wanted that I never was, it was 3 weeks where Jackson slept at home and other nights I did not know. Since I released him the first time I have practiced not calling him, nor investigating him, not asking questions and much less talking about him with others, which caused my circle to be reduced to only God in relation to Jackson. The subject of my marriage and my companion of encouragement was Doris who has been a blessing for my life.
Yesterday Jackson returned home with all his things. It was not a return of love, or soap operas, there were no tears or anything. God had already been working in the 3 weeks before in which he was in and out and in which he made it clear to me during those days through parables that he wanted to start a life together again. I just said it's okay. I didn't ask when he was coming back, or when all this would be. Also during this time God allowed Jackson to confess to me the work of God in the relationship with the OW which was hell during all that time. This shows that when we do not see anything with our carnal eyes they turn bitter as wormwood. Jackson never had a moment of peace or happiness with her. If I had listened to the comments of people of everything that Jackson published on the networks of his supposed happiness and love, things would not have changed as with the help of God. I did not pay attention to the news from people who told me forget about him, and that he looks very happy on the networks. I just did not follow the conversations and declared believing the end of that relationship, so my unconditional love, my soft and calm spirit attracted him more each day. Keeping my mouth shut, not complaining or asking questions gave Jackson the confidence of being able to be by my side knowing that he would not feel uncomfortable with me asking questions.
During these 8 months of my journey, I did not watch television, I closed all social networks, I only used WhatsApp and I will continue like this because I feel I have more time to be the woman that God wants me to be, I sought the Lord 3 times a day, and my days of work since I woke up I fell to the ground on my knees immediately to surrender my spirit and will to the Lord, I spent at least 1 hour and a half or two with the Lord in prayer and meditation on his word before going to work. On my days off I was at home just meditating on his word and applying each principle of his word. I learned to read the bible, to pray and fast. I didn't go anywhere. My free time from work was invested in studying the word and learning how to please my Lord.
In the last 3 weeks I have been crying out to the Lord and very alert so that my time with Him is not affected, asking for wisdom on how to seek Him now with Jackson at home because I have come to depend on Him for everything and I feel that if I do not have it I die. He has become all I have, all I want, all I long for. It's the love of my life. Even so, I get up early to surrender my life to Him. I want to tell you that at the beginning I had also looked for a church to congregate, which caused my Jackson to harden, I immediately learned of this in course 2. I let go of it and the heart of Jackson changed quickly. Following the biblical principles is the only solution, but let go of everything and focus on Him who wants to give you His love.
Yes, I knew that it was close because Jackson had broken up with the OW and was already sleeping at home although he had not returned with his things.
Would you recommend any of our resources in particular that helped you, Kenisha?
Of course, the book How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage, the online courses, the book A Wise Woman.
Would you be interested in helping encourage other women, Kenisha?
of course!
Either way, Kenisha, what kind of encouragement would you like to leave women with, in conclusion?
In conclusion my dear ones, seek the Lord. Cling to his promises, do not hesitate in them, because faithful is He who promised, surrender to God, let go of marriage restoration and focus on changing your heart. Faithful is He who says in Jeremiah 29:10-14 I will visit you, and will awaken my good word upon you, to bring you back to this place... I will bring back your captivity, and I will gather you from all nations and from all places where I have driven you out, saith the Lord; and I will bring you back to the place from which I led you. When they are fully restored to Him He is faithful to bring their earthly husbands, but leave it to the Holy Spirit of God because only He will do it.
