"But I have against you that you have abandoned your first love." R2:4
Please read these short passages quoted from How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage, Chapter 5:
"Have you left your first love? Who is your first love? Was your husband your first love?...
What happens when you put someone ahead of the Lord? What does He do to draw you back to Him? If you have put your husband ahead of the Lord, then it was the Lord who has taken your husband from you... Don’t make marriage restoration first in your life; you must make the Lord first in your life!:"
If I'm going to be honest I have to admit, not even my spouse was my first love, but the obsession to get a restored marriage became my first love. It got so bad that I didn't care how much I hurt the other woman and I say this with so much shame because she didn't deserve it at all. And I thought I had every right to hurt her so much and justify myself by saying that he was my husband first, but I was so very wrong.
Precious bride I want to encourage you please not make the same mistake I did, nothing is as important as our precious Beloved Lord, not even marriage restoration. Don't lose yourself in the process just to get a restored marriage, it's not worth it, but our precious Beloved Lord is definitely worth it, so make Him first in your life.
I am glad I finally found your website it has been a battle
I am standing for my marriage and I have been listening
to your testimonies and I want that intimate
relationship with the Lord that I have heard every woman
on your website testify about.
Precious Florence I am so grateful you found our Ministry. And I am so excited because I know this is the start for you to also have a intimate relationship with our Darling Lord. Please kindly will you fill in this Marriage Encouragement Questionaire.
https://hopeatlast.com/meq/
Hello precieuse janine, before arriving at RMI I absolutely wanted my marriage to be restored I didn’t care about my actions I just wanted to get my husband back. My egoism made me see only my own suffering. Today I give thanks to our beloved for having removed this heart of stone from me.
Thank you for sharing precious Kateleen, I also didn’t care about my actions, but I am so grateful that our Darling Lord is the Potter and we the clay. https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Isaiah%2064%3A8&version=NIV
“He who loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; he who loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me” M1037.
Thank you for this valuable reminder Janine, I think that is one of the idols that we often find difficult to destroy, because it is confusing to let go and love the husband as well as not wanting restoration but remembering that it is the only way for married women to be reconciled or to remain alone [not completely, but only with the Lord as Husband].
Maybe in my case it was something I embraced because in my family I had the example of two aunts who were divorced and chose not to remarry, they stayed alone and I saw that they did much better, compared to my aunt who was widowed and remarried, although it was “in the Lord” with a widowed man from the same church and who loves the Lord, she had many problems getting along with him and the children of both of them from the previous marriages, so it didn’t work out… With those examples I contemplated staying alone with Him as a good way of life if my earthly husband chose divorce [as he had told me]. However, I understood that these are good things: marriage and restoration, only it has to do with having the right heart, loving the earthly husband as if one loved the Lord through him and waiting for restoration NOT out of one’s own desire, I mean, not because we think we won’t be able to live a good life if we don’t get that thing, but out of the desire for Him to be glorified, that we will use Him to be a testimony of His love, to attract others to HIM, not for our pleasure, but for His glory. However, we need His help to tear down both idols of the heart and be able to direct our desires to the right place.
I know what you mean precious Anastasia, for me it was so long an obsession and my own selfish desires to get what I want and I totally believe our Darling Lord has a heart for marriages and wants to restore marriage for His glory, but yes that we not make it an idol, like I made it an obsession. You are so right we do need His help to tear down both idols of the heart, to be able to direct our desires to the right place, because apart from Him we can do nothing.
Janine, before I was restored the first time, I became super obsessed with my marriage. I tried to follow the principles perfectly, but I ended up heartbroken from trying so hard to do everything right (on my own, in my flesh). But the Lord did end up bringing my EH back home. About 20 years later, my life was falling apart again because I went back to my old ways (I was actually way worse than before). My heart was so bitter and hard, and instead of my EH leaving like the first time, I told him to leave and that I wanted a divorce. I think the Lord used that second time to draw me back to Him and was basically saying, “Will you trust me and let ME handle it this time?” He changed my bitter heart. I am so thankful to Him for all the heartbreak because if not, I would not have ran to Him, I would not have found this intimate relationship with Him. I would not have realized that He needs to be my everything! My marriage was restored a second time and although it is not near to perfect. My Beloved tells me He is I AM, I AM perfect and I AM all you need.
What a beautiful testimony precious Hope, thank you for sharing. I am also grateful for the heartbreak I went through, He just knows best.
Janine, thank you for your words. I think I didn’t put my earthly husband first either, I put my family, brothers, parents first, not only above him but above my Beloved.
And that led me to this Journey… And I thank Him for having shown me that He is first and that His love is the most important thing above all.
And now I ask Him every day that He be the one who occupies the place in my heart, and that His Will be done in me. Because I arrived in this way looking for restoration, and little by little with what we are learning, the most important thing is to Love Our Heavenly Husband.
Thank you for sharing it.
Thank you for sharing precious Liza, isn’t it wonderful how He shows us with so much love and tenderness and it is so worth it to put Him first.
Dear Janine, My highest goal was also to have my marriage restored. The lesson you share was an eye-opener for me too. I had left my first Love. I had put my ex-husband first. I am so incredibly grateful that He brought me to this ministry and taught me and let me experience that He must be my first Love. It is so wonderful to have Him as my Heavenly Man, I enjoy my life with Him!
Thank you for sharing precious Hanna, I am also so very grateful that He led me to this Ministry and is teaching every day.
this is so true and encouraging. I too was so focused on my husband, my marriage, constantly worried about what I could do or make him do to fix everything. little did I know, how far off I was from God. I am actually so grateful that this happened, that the Lord opened my eyes to the truth and I can be with Him
Thank you for sharing precious Rasa, I am also grateful this happened and years ago I wouldn’t have said this, but whatever He allowed in my life, was to draw me closer to Him and it is so worth it.