My Husband has led me to delve a little deeper into the healing process regarding perfectionism that I could classify as a scheme or perhaps a mental strength that was born as a thought and over the years has been fortified with habits.
A perfectionist can notice any detail that is out of place, that in general can be considered a gift, but when used in the wrong way it does damage (as with any other gift). An example of this is what happened to my skin, any “imperfection” jumped out at me as the MOST terrible thing and all I wanted to do was have perfect skin while I was anguished because it is one of the feelings that accompany the perfectionist when it does not achieve perfection.
In my case, the desire for perfection arose in my childhood. On one hand, I admired how neat and tidy my father was. In general, my home and the houses of all my aunts remained impeccable, which I inherited, as something that was expected of me. I remember that the first thing I did when I got up in the morning made the bed, it had to be perfect all day, I would get angry when someone sat on my bed in my absence, I would notice when they returned and I would question who it had been π«£everyone knew and they avoided doing it.
This perfectionism reached the extreme due to pride because I competed with myself to be better than others and that becomes like a prison that steals our joy. But my Beloved knew what tool to use to start dealing with it, and that was my EH, he is the opposite of me in terms of perfection, he is a free spirit, who cares very little about the order, and is The way in which my Celestial Husband has led me to use the gift of order and perfectionism in a balanced way, at the beginning it was very frustrating because while I was tidying up he was messing up, I cried with my Beloved and asked Him for help to manage my feelings and have that love that is patient. He helped me understand that he gave me a gift for his service, and He reminds me of two of my praise testimonies that portray part of that healing process or therapy that my Beloved has used to heal me:
1. https://elanimador.com/el-se-esta-encargando-de-aliviar-mi-carga-parte-uno/
2. https://elanimador.com/el-se-esta-encargando-de-aliviar-mi-carga-parte-dos/
God says: βJust as iron sharpens iron, a person sharpens the character of his friendβ P2717
That has been my husband in this process, a tool in His hands to free me from anguish, pride, pain, and excess perfectionism and thus lead me to feel at peace, joy, and enjoyment of life. It leads me to stop chasing perfection because all He wants me to chase is Him. And it is in chasing Him that I find my greatest delight.
I thank my Beloved because now I do not feel frustrated, instead, I have learned to love my husband with patience for his disorder and likewise He has given my husband a new spirit of service at home, he helps me to keep order and more recently I hire someone to help me a few days a week with cleaning. It wasn’t something I asked for, but I know it’s Him releasing me from the burden.
~ Anastasia
Spanish LMF πͺπΈ
https://elanimador.com/
I am sure trying to be perfect must be very tiring and frustrating my dearest Anastasia. Im so glad that He has delivered you of this. I was reminded of a Living Lesson…. I went to go read it but l see its opposite to what you are sharing.
https://loveatlast.org/living-lessons/week-50-misidentified-characteristic-2/
Perhaps my Husband wants me to share it π€
What if you are the complete opposite of a perfectionist? I believe that no matter what our struggle is He wants to help us but we each need to ask Him and tell Him about our struggle just like you did!!
Hello my dear Atarah, thank you for your beautiful comment. After reading your comment I thought in the LL “Useless ditch” https://loveatlast.org/living-lessons/week-10-useless-ditch/
As you said all of us struggle with some habits or thoughts, and definitely, He helps us with anything if we ask for help from Him.
Anastasia my darling I donβt know how I missed this. Itβs wonderful. I havenβt yet clicked on the links you provided but I did want to say I must quote you and add it to the new HHM chapter.
βHe lead me to feel at peace, joy, and the enjoyment of life. He leads me to stop chasing perfection because all He wants me to chase is Him.β WOW π€© how beautiful. ππππ
Oh and He is healing your perfectionism. I noticed you didnβt add the #tag https://encouragingwomen.org/tag/perfect/
Whatβs exciting is we can get excited by oversights and mistakes and gain strength as we βboast about our weaknessesβ ππ»ππ»ππ»
βΊοΈ π He is healing me! Thank you for the encouragement!!