Freya, how did your restoration actually begin?
In September I discovered that my husband had another woman. When I asked him about it, he simply said that our marriage was over and that he had been living a single life for some time. My world collapsed, I cried a lot and begged him to seek God to rebuild our home and he accepted. For a while, we read the Bible and prayed together, but he continued to see OW. And I lived more and more distressed and sad. Nothing he did or said placated the pain of seeing him arriving home late and confirming he was still seeing another woman. We fought because I wanted him to give her up and stay with me. Each time he agreed, but he did not have the strength to leave the relationship. I felt a deep desire for revenge to go out with another person, because I felt like trash, abandoned and rejected.
In July I got to the pit of my sadness. I had lost a lot of weight, and my face was disfigured with depression. Until I searched for testimonies of restored marriages on the internet and I asked God to help me, to guide me. I still remember the moment I clicked on something (I do not know what happened), and your website appeared that had beautiful testimonies of restored marriages. It was HopeAtLast.com (RMI). As I read it, God was convincing me that I would also find victory, and it also clarified why this was happening to me.
I have always been a Christian, and I was part of the top leadership of our church, but I was in a very cold and distant phase with my Lord, even though I was serving in the church. I lived a life of religion, not a relationship. I was aware of my need for it and always asked God to help me to enjoy His presence, to take pleasure in seeking Him, reading His Word, but I had never really felt anything much for Him.
Then I discovered that this particular crisis was God's way of drawing my attention to Him and that I would go through a journey of restoration with Him and for Him, to get to know Him. Immediately I started taking course 1, and I loved each moment of this course because it was as if God was speaking directly to me, telling me what I should learn and do. I sang love songs from the start and had alone time with Him and my coffee, as the course suggests. Truly these were the happiest moments of the day for me.
Even knowing the principles, I found myself confronting and snooping, but I felt that God was always reaching out to me, helping me to rise and to rise, again and again. The most difficult was to LET GO; it caused me a lot of pain and suffering because it implied breaking my pride. I remember rolling on the floor crying with so much pain. I never knew that I could feel such great pain in my soul.
One day I begged Him for forgiveness for all the things I had done to Him as my Husband, all the betrayal I'd done to my first love, and I felt a peace that surpasses all understanding. I began to seek my HH with deep fasting and much prayer, and every time I sought Him, I discovered that He could give me the joy unspeakable, replacing the pain. I began to feel less and less pain and more and more joy in Him.
He showed me unbelievable miracles that I would have thought impossible for me. I would watch my husband get all fixed up to go out on a date with the other woman, yet I felt neither pain nor sorrow. All I wanted to do was praise and adore my Greater Love, and this was the most incredible experience I have ever experienced.
How did God change your situation, Freya, as you sought Him wholeheartedly?
My EH said that I needed to leave, the day after Christmas, so even in the midst of tears I was able to agree and say in my heart, "I will not fear, because You are with me." Several times, I repeated this and felt the Lord comforting me and lifting me above this circumstance.
Three days after I left, the Lord led my EH to call me, wanting to know how I was doing and asking to spend New Year's Day with me and our children. And that day he mentioned us coming home, but said he had to solve some problems first. He said that the Lord took the scales from his eyes and that this made him see the incredible woman that I am becoming and that he loved me. Only the Lord could make this miracle happen.
It still took more than 90 days for him to ask me to come home. Of course, we still needed time to move into a more full restoration, because my EH still didn't wear a wedding ring or tell me he loved me. (He just said it that one day he told me what the Lord did to him). But I knew that God is Faithful and that He would do much more abundantly beyond what we ask or think, for He is the One who gives us peace and prosperity to continue to the end so that He can give us our heart's desire.
To Him all glory, honor, and power. In Your hands is all control, so we need not fear. God rules over all things.
I am eternally grateful to be able to say, "I knew You only by hearing, but now my eyes see You." I never want to leave You again, for I know that only under Your wings am I safe and happy. My Perfect Love. You're everything I want, everything I need, You reign and live in me forever and ever.
I also praise His Name for Erin, who has been willing to tell her whole journey of faith and restoration, then betrayal again from people she's helped. The enemy continues to fight against her for this, because of how many, many homes and families that have been saved, including mine. Glory to God for using her life!
What principles, from God's Word (or through our resources), Freya, did the Lord teach you during this trial?
I studied and learned all the resources and principles that were taught to me here, but the ones that impacted me most was not being Contentious, not confronting, not gossiping, being meek and quiet, LETTING GO and Tithing from your first fruits to your storehouse.
What were the most difficult times that God helped you through, Freya?
The hardest time the Lord helped me was when my husband declared that he wanted me to leave. The other was watching Him going out every weekend to go on a date as if he was single. It devastated me, but the Lord gave me the way of escape in His Word and His Promises. The more I praised, the more I was able to enjoy my journey.
Freya, what was the “turning point” of your restoration?
The turning point was when the Lord spoke to him about me returning home, and two days later the Lord showed him that I should return and that my place was at home and we were a family.
Tell us HOW it happened Freya? Did your husband just walk in the front door? Freya, did you suspect or could you tell you were close to being restored?
Since he asked me to leave the house, I knew that the Lord would turn his heart to want me to come back. I was sure, and I always hoped against all hope for it. But the Lord surprised me with the statement from my EH that he wanted me to come back after 7 days from when he’d first asked me to leave our home, although it took 90 days for me to return.
Would you recommend any of our resources in particular that helped you, Freya?
I would recommend the courses, as these begin with testimonies of restoration that are very encouraging, and they take you through the book How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage in their Course 1, and then I'd go to Course 2 and finally through A Wise Woman or Course 3. They are each inspirational, wonderful, and biblical.
Would you be interested in helping encourage other women, Freya?
Yes
Either way, Freya, what kind of encouragement would you like to leave women with, in conclusion?
Beloved brides of our Heavenly Husband, He will never fail. You must believe and embrace what He has prepared for each one of us. The more we go to Him, the more He teaches us to love Him, because of how much He loves us and makes us see that our restoration is completely in His hands. He will fight for us, for He hates divorce and His Word is LIFE.
Want MORE Restored Marriage Testimonies? There are 41 testimonies to read in WOTT5, 35 in WOTT6 and another 31 in WOTT7 for even MORE encouragement.
We also offer By the Word of Their Testimony Full Series Packet: 6 eBooks and in paperback By the Word of Their Testimony Full Series COMBO Packet: Paperback & eBooks.