I wasnโ€™t sure what was up ahead

5 months ago I was living with my in-laws, working overnight, and taking care of my kids. Exhausted and humiliated constantly. It was tough to remain quiet and bless the ones that came against me. The old me, always wanted to retaliate and I failed many times, but with each test turning the other cheek got easier. In November my HH (Heavenly Husband) blessed me with an apartment right before I lost my job and car.

I knew I was being led to this place and it was a miracle that I was approved. I was a little afraid to do what my HH asked me but I read many testimonies about how God provided a way for brides to stay in their homes supernaturally. I believed once I moved Iโ€™d be there for good, but my ways are not his ways. For 3 months my HH made sure we had food, internet, furniture, necessities, and time together just the 3 of us. It felt like a vacation and Iโ€™m so grateful for my time with my children. My daughter even ended up getting close to her HF (Heavenly Father) and was baptized!

The last couple of weeks have been the hardest to walk through because I had to leave my little oasis and also let go of my children. My EH (earthly husband) and OW (other women) now have them for the week and I have them on the weekends. Letting go has always been tough but my HH (Heavenly Husband) held my hand along the way, letting me know that when I release control he can move freely.

I asked him to break me, so I would never go back to being the woman I was. More than anything I wanted his will to be done, even if that meant letting go of the life I wanted (being a stay-at-home mom and wife.) I praise him because Iโ€™ve come to the place of full surrender. I'm able to give freely, and I no longer look to my role as a wife and mother to fill voids. I moved in with my mom and Iโ€™ve been able to share some of the principles of RMI through my actions. My HH also opens the door for the jobs that Iโ€™ve been waiting on. I have no idea whatโ€™s up ahead but Iโ€™m so thankful that my HH has kept me in perfect peace. Thereโ€™s is no way that I could have walked through this season without him and Iโ€™m just thankful that he never left.

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9 thoughts on “I wasnโ€™t sure what was up ahead”

  1. Thank you for sharing this beautiful testimony precious Bellissima, it touched my heart and I look forward for more testimonies that are on the way. Wow it is so awesome that you came to the place of full surrender, in His loving arms is the best ever place to be and you get to sit back and enjoy our Darling Lord’s everlasting love and see what He does.

    Please read Adina’s Restoration Journey Novel: “My Custody Loss” – https://narrowroadpublishinghouse.com/rjn-adina/

  2. Dear Bellissima, it’s so true that the moment we let go/surrender, it’s amazing how free it feels. I just want to encourage you to continue this journey with the Lord. The moment I realized He is the only one that matters and I am able to stay content in Him alone, I never looked back nor did I want to.

  3. My dear Bellissima, letting go of your children is never easy, for more than a year I was in the same situation, only seeing my children over weekends. But I surrendered the situation during the custody case and for that year I was on Honeymoon with my Beloved Heavenly Husband. And He completely turned my situation around. You can read more about my journey here: https://narrowroadpublishinghouse.com/rjn-adina/

    1. Adina, your story has helped me a lot. Thank you for being open enough to share your trials and triumphs its paved the way for me and made my walk through the valley a lot smoother.

  4. Beloved Bellรญsima

    Lately, as a stay-at-home mom, I have been facing issues with patience, rest and letting go some things. And I Hace a constant reminder of God’s plan VS devil’s one.
    โ€ญโ€ญJohnโ€ฌ โ€ญ10:10โ€ฌ โ€ญNLTโ€ฌโ€ฌ
    [10] The thiefโ€™s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.

    Every attack, challenge and adverse circumstances is not only a issue to deal with but a chance to see our Dearest Love.

    By reading you today, I can figure out how hard and tough has been to go against everything and keep praising and trusting. ๐Ÿ™ It just by faith. It must be our response to get what He’s already done for us.

    Psalm 36 comes to my mind, too.

    โ€ญโ€ญPsalmsโ€ฌ โ€ญ36:7โ€ฌ โ€ญNLTโ€ฌโ€ฌ
    [7] How precious is your unfailing love, O God! All humanity finds shelter in the shadow of your wings.
    [10] Pour out your unfailing love on those who love you; give justice to those with honest hearts.

    God only knows what it’s up ahead. But you can rest in His unfailing love โค๏ธ, you might find that shelter in His wings, you will get that rich and satisfying life He has promised. He will be your fountain of life, the light by which you see.

    Keep trusting Him. HE is up ahead.

  5. Dear Bellรญsima, certainly letting go and surrendering every area of โ€‹โ€‹our life has a high price, but it does not compare to the price He pays for each of our loved ones. Our cross, although it may seem heavy at times, is light when we support ourselves and the load for us, so great is his love that he even helps us carry the cross and endure every problem. I am very happy to read that He changed you and has managed to resist your opponent, I am happy that in the midst of these circumstances you are giving a sacrifice of freedom that trusts in His name to decide that despite everything you trust Him. I praise my Beloved for Adina’s novel that helped you and was a bridge for you to cross this valley with hope. Our Beloved is always good!! My Beloved, I remember Abraham’s struggle when he had to release Isaac [his promise to him] to his brothers…you can trust that He will give you much more than what you are letting go!! He is faithful!

  6. Hermoso TA y me recuerda mucho esa temporada dรณnde comencรฉ a confiar completamente en mi amado y no hacer planes de nada, sabiendo que รฉl tiene el control en todo momento. Al principio cuesta mucho, pero ya luego se hace sรบper fรกcil ๐Ÿ˜œ gracias por compartir tu experiencia en esta etapa de tu viaje, bendiciones ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿป

    Beautiful TA and reminds me a lot of that season where I started to completely trust my beloved and not make plans for anything, knowing that he is in control at all times. At first it costs a lot, but then it becomes super easy ๐Ÿ˜œ thank you for sharing your experience at this stage of your journey, blessings ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿป

  7. Thank for sharing Dear Belรญssima and great faith!
    It is awesome to know that He never leave us, this is the verse that I try to hold on to mostly, because sometimes in trials we forget, that we are going through with Him.
    โ€ญโ€ญPsalmsโ€ฌ โ€ญ23:4โ€ฌ โ€ญNIVโ€ฌโ€ฌ

    [4] Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

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