My transition from attending church to spending time with Him on a Sunday began during the height of my marriage troubles. I was doing Course 2 and read the lesson "My Spiritual Leader". It made a lot of sense especially with the testimony of the Mennonite woman which helped me to understand a bit more. I really just wanted to be obedient but what sealed the deal for me was after I had spoken to the pastor and his wife of the church I was attending...
I scheduled a meeting with them because I was hurting and confused and needed some kind of direction and walked away from that meeting more confused. From what I could understand they were saying was that basically as long I had done my best and all that I could to restore my marriage that it was fine to move on. I realised that what they believed regarding marriage and divorce was completely the opposite of what I was being taught here and I did not want to become "double-minded".
Becoming a member of Restoration Fellowship just sealed the deal for me.
My HH changed me in so many ways. What stands out for me is that I stopped striving and fighting for what I wanted in life. I became happy with the plans and purposes that He had for me. I was happy to lose control of my life to give it to my HH because I knew that His plans were so much better than my own.
The most difficult times that my HH helped me through during my transition from going to church with staying home with Him was going through my divorce. Due to the intimacy, I had with my HH, He gave me the strength and peace I needed to sign the divorce papers letting me know deep in my spirit that I could sign and that it would be ok.
My turning point was probably when I gave up control of my life, my marriage, dreams, and desires to Him in order for my HH to take control.
My Sundays if often different because my EH takes us to church as a family. There are many Sundays that we don't attend church as EH works and sometimes he fishes overnight. There was a time I probably would have nagged him and been upset with him about us not going to church!
So for those Sundays, I get to spend with Him! I enjoy staying a bit later in bed reading my Encourager and just speaking to Him about anything and everything. I tidy up a bit listening to my Love Song playlist. I have always enjoyed watching traveling shows so recently I have enjoyed watching a food traveling show with Him telling Him how I would love to travel with Him seeing particular places and trying out some gourmet meals lol 🙂
Most Sundays as a family we head out to the beach for a swim later in the afternoon so I get to enjoy the sea, the sand, clouds, and sunsets with Him.
I have so many Love Songs now :)) I have a playlist on Spotify named "Beloved".
One of my favourites is called Lucky by Jason Mraz. Here is some of my favorite lyrics 🙂
I'm talking to you
Across the water across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky, oh my, baby I'm trying
Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel your whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Dear Radiant Bride. I will never forget the day I realised how fulfilled I was with just Him. I literally had that light bulb moment... I just stood in wonder thinking to myself how absolutely SATISFIED I felt and how COMPLETE. I really did not need anything or anyone else, only my HH.
Once you start spending that intimate time with Him telling Him everything and He takes away your hurts may you also come to the same conclusion that you have to let go in order to experience so much MORE of Him and the future that He has for you!