Losing the Love of My Life to Find the Lover of My Soul

Today was a beautiful day spent with my children and mother-in-law, full of joy. This evening brought an email informing me that my EH had removed me from family sharing on our mobile devices. The pain began to set in, but I said to myself, “Don’t let it steal your peace.”

As soon as I could, I got alone and told my HH how it was just another painful reminder of the destruction of my family and everything we’ve worked for together. I read a “Love Letter” from the book “Come Away My Beloved,” and (as often happens with that book) the words were like balm to my soul and none of the temporal things mattered anymore.

I thanked my Beloved for the many gifts I’ve received and told Him, “You’re all I want. You’re all I need. You’re all I live for.” As I stood to go back out to my family, I realized I could hardly bring my EH to mind. It was as if he didn’t exist, and nothing he is doing in this season matters at all. For nearly 2 decades this man has been the love of my life, but I’ve found the Lover of my soul. The light of His countenance causes the memory of any other to fade.

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7 thoughts on “Losing the Love of My Life to Find the Lover of My Soul”

  1. Thank you so much for sharing d.malachi for sharing. It is incredible what He does. When He enters our lives nothing else matters. His love fills our souls, we constantly walk with His peace and a smile on our faces. I was very encouraged to read about the Love of your Soul.

  2. WOW, what an encouraging PRAISE d.malachi. The title caught my eye and reading it was even better than I had imagined!! You have HOPE at last and LOVE at last, all tied together in the perfect package as an Encouraging Woman!!
    Everything you said is so true. I just read https://narrowroadpublishinghouse.com/rjn-leah/ from Sara’s website and it just reminded me it’s the same theme. We are so conditioned to run after meer men when there’s the perfect Husband who can love us as we long to be.
    For married women, this means getting all their love from their Husband and giving their love to their EH… never the other way around, making us vulnerable because we know what GOD says,
    “But I have this against you, that you have left your FIRST love.” R24

    1. Erin I don’t know why I am always amazed at how my HL answers my questions. Your comment “For married women, this means getting all their love from their Husband and giving their love to their EH… never the other way around..” My mind has had a little trouble figuring out how to have a Husband and an earthly husband (now that he is home) but that comment pretty much summed it up for me. I am at work right now, but just jotted down on my note pad (2 hours ago) “Ask my HL how I am to have Him as my Husband and my EH now that he is home.” I get here on my lunch break and He answered me. 🙂

      1. Hope, I was mulling over Erin’s comment too, and this was my thought trail…

        The curse on Eve: “Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” (Gen. 3:16b). Obsessing over my earthly husband is, most assuredly, a CURSE!

        “Nor was man created for the woman, but the woman for the man” (1 Cor. 11:9) because “The Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone…” (Gen. 2:18). So much of the crushing weight of expectation I feel in relation to my EH is weight I put on myself. Most of the time, he is just happy to be with me. And that really is at the heart of marriage, what we all truly desire: companionship. This seems to me what men really want most.

        It also seems to me that because men rely so heavily on their women, that the deceiver goes after us. It says in 1 Timothy 2:14, “Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived, fell into transgression.” This is why I must constantly renew my mind with truth.

        My husband will never be enough for me, because I need the Lover of my soul. He fills me with truth and love to pour out on my EH (and anyone else who crosses my path). Only then am I in a position to properly receive the admiration of my earthly husband or anyone else, for that matter. “A woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.” (Prov. 31:30).

  3. Amazing my dear, how He changes everything and gives us freedom from ourselves!! Praise the Lord you found Him!!!

  4. d.malachi This post was very encouraging and I’m so glad you were able to get alone with your HH and were able to have Him and His comfort and peace.

  5. Thank you d.malachi for sharing this, it encourage me to see the benefit of the distance our earthly men take. Now I have even more freedom to focus on the fact of spending more and deeper time with my Beloved. He is truly all we need to get everything we need to pass on to the people we love around us. nice to know that I am truly free from the curse that keeps me bound in focus on my earthly man. I needed to hear that again.

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