Trying to Do It by Myself Again

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♕ Today's Promise: "I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears." Psalm 34:4

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As we all know this situation that we are going through has brought on financial struggles for most of us. I myself cannot pay all our bills. I’ve been seeking My HH (Heavenly Husband) for answers and direction. I tithe to my storehouse (RMI) and He has provided for us faithfully, rebuking the devourer.

Everyone says I should go out and get a job. My Former Earthly Husband told me that I am also no longer covered by his medical insurance and that I needed to go get a job to provide myself with medical insurance. He even looked for places for me and said if I don’t apply he will do it for me. I went straight to My HH and asked Him what does He want for me.

I have been a stay at home mom for 17 years, we have 6 children of all ages. I still have 5 living at home going to school and attending college. I don’t see how I would be able to leave them and get a job and still do all that I do here for them and I feel that My HH (Heavenly Husband) didn’t want that either.

Recently I was lead to take online courses to work from home. It has a lot to do with finances and computers. These are the 2 things that I am not good at nor am I interested in. I can’t remember numbers at all. I have to write them down and go over them more than once. As for computers I have no clue. But this is where My HH has lead me. I made sure that this is what He wanted before I tried something based on my own thinking and worry about our finances, failing and costing me to be in more debt. I would never think to be doing this and I just didn’t think I was capable of it. I still signed myself up and said—well My Love, I can’t do this but You can. I don’t see a way but I know You will make a way.

I did get excited a bit because I felt that doing something that was so out of my comfort zone and that I knew I couldn’t do on my own would mean that My Love would be doing it with me and He would be right by my side, ever so close to me.

(Deuteronomy 31:8) "It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”

Well I struggled in the beginning and My HH (Heavenly Husband) showed me that I was trying to do it by myself again. So I would step away and speak to Him. We got through the first courses and quizzes.

Glory to God!! \o/ because I still don’t quite understand some of it but He told me to just keep going and it will all come together and make sense.

The next section of the course is working more with the computer. I had a lot of trouble. I couldn’t upload files, I couldn’t change them to correct format, couldn’t connect the mouse to the computer. Then eventually the laptop stopped connecting to the internet at all. One of our sons tried to help me but it wasn’t working. I walked away from the laptop with a headache.

Mind you this is all on our oldest sons laptop that he offered to let me borrow before I even signed up for the courses. When he offered it I said no I don’t need it and don’t know how to work it. Then a week later this opportunity presented itself. I asked if I could use the laptop after all. Another blessing from My HH!

So the next morning I said—ok My Love, I don’t know how to do this but I know You do. I walked over to work on it again. I don’t like clicking on things, being afraid I will mess something up, add something that will damage the computer or delete a program all together and lose what’s on it.

Ladies, He helped me find the problem!! We clicked on a few things and “restored” something and it’s now connected to the internet again!! We connected the mouse and got it set up to use!!! And we got on the program and reformatted the document I needed, saved it and now I’m ready to move onto the next level!!!

This is something I definitely did not do myself!! I actually could not even explain what was done or be able to do it again. It was My HH who made it all work. It was Him who lead me and took my fear and replaced it with His Wisdom!!

"It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” Deuteronomy 31:8

"I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears." Psalm 34:4

He does not want us to live in fear. He wants us to trust Him. He is able to do anything!! Nothing is impossible with Him!!

"But Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.'” Matthew 19:26

"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him." James 1:5

Go to Him with all your problems, all your decisions, all your struggles and all your fears. Let Him do it. Surrender all to Him and be willing to do His Will.

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