♕ Today's Promise: And He has said to me, "Sing praises to God, sing praises; sing praises to our King, sing praises. For God is the King of all the earth; sing to him a psalm of praise." Psalm 47:6-8
Since the beginning of my journey, Daddy had me grow so much, it is incredible. Yet this week, I began asking Him to show me what is it that was missing. I was not feeling complete in my relation with Him. Something was bothering me and I couldn't put my hands on it.
You see, my earthly husband never left home, He just built a hate wall that is on and off, depending on his moods and circumstances. There is absolutely no intimacy and there never have been, no pet name, nothing like that. We are like roommates (who respect each other, speak from time to time, even laugh) or just parents if you might. The difficulty I am facing, but my Sweetheart is faithful, is to be obedient to my SweetHubby by being submissive, kind, gentle and nice to my earthly husband, and yet still let go of him. Believe me, when you are 24/7 with somebody (confinement, out of a job, etc), it is not that easy knowing if you have let go or not. I get to cook, clean, laundry and do everything for him as he is still home.
I asked the Lord to show me if I had truly let go of earthly husband, because he does not have it (chapter 6 FAL), he is not my Source, Sweet Lord is. He is all I need and all I want. Yet, yesterday, earthly husband went out in the day time without saying bye or anything. It did not happen in a long time. And I could see it affected me. I felt disrespected and used. So I came to know that I have not let completely go of him. There was my answer ! Less than 10 days ago, I heard a song that I used to love (not to use the word "adore"). I haven't heard this song since 1999. And I was thinking, "wow, it is odd that I am hearing it now."
Yesterday I had to read about the "love songs chapter". To be honest, I always thought, "this is not for me, I don't want to do that, I don't want to have a song". And then it hit me ! My Sweet Lord was showing me the way to get closer to HIM, He showed what was missing to me to be fully and completely HIS, HE showed me what was going to be the cherry in our cake, the song ! When I asked Him to show me what song, believe me, that one that I heard a few days ago, came back so fast into my mind, that I could see HIs mighty hands having orchestrated everything. As I woke up this morning listening to that song over and over, I am just like, "how can such a song could be sang to a human being, that's just impossible."
I should have known better than just ignored what Erin and other women who have walked down that road before advised.
All I want is more intimacy with HIM, I want Him fully. I don't care about restoration, earthly husband does not have it, All I WANT AND NEED is The Lord.