Believe Even if We See Nothing!

♕ Today's Promise: “Then I will make up to you for the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the creeping locust, the stripping locust and the gnawing locust, My great army which I sent among you." Joel 2:25

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This story began when I decided to surrender completely to the Lord, and believe that He could restore my family that was not only broken, was totally destroyed by all the evil that was in me...when my EH and I were going to separate because he found out the worst mistake I made in all my horrible life. Far from GOD, there is no justification for hurting and humiliating our family, and that is what I did. I damaged the heart of a good and wonderful man who loved me, even if I was in prison from my bad thoughts. I always thought that he cheated on me many times and I used that justification to harm him too.

During that crisis, my EH was filled with hatred, repudiation and depression, I thought I was going to go crazy. My eyes were lost and I focused a lot on alcohol, because our relationship was wrong. He already disappeared at the end of the week with friends drinking. But after this crisis, he did not come home and when he arrived he only humiliated me and insulted me and kept me from repudiating and disgusting myself, of what I did. It was so hard to live day by day with that great weight. He was looking for a way to make me feel bad, because of how he felt and that was understandable because I destroyed that beautiful love we had. He suffered a lot, and me too, because I was guilty of everything.

During the first months that I met HH, I asked Him in tears and groans, to forgive me for what I did, and to put forgiveness in my husband for me, to heal his heart and give him peace. And in all my prayers, I told my Beloved HH that if it was His will, would He transform the heart of my EH to love Him, even if he has to be separated from me.

The more I prayed, the worse my EH got, but I received a promise from my HH, Joel 2:25, "...I will reward you for all the years that devoured the great army that I sent." When I read that promise I held on tight to Him and began to thank my HH for telling me that He was going to restore everything. Glory to HIM!!

HH began to change me and made me soft and gentle and above all respectful, (I needed a lot of humiliation and repudiation for it). I understood that the process that made me live with my EH was to polish me and remove all arrogance from me, while I was transforming, my EH's heart was the careful man of his family and more collaborator at home, (he was before, but only with his children). We passed many tests quitting alcohol was not easy, less while he did not know GOD, he made fun of me, and refused to approach him, I tried to preach in my despair. But it was a big mistake that prompted him to humiliate me more, but nothing could with all the LOVE that HH gave me, and the one that I began to give to my children and him, through my actions.

The most applied teaching for me was WON WITHOUT A WORD, which bore beautiful fruits. My children began to pray with me. My daughter who had been very rebellious was also won with love. We prayed a lot for her father. One day, he came home early from work, found us praying at 3 in the living room, and my son invited him to pray...and that was the day when he began to fall into love with my HH.

Won without a word, that was the principle that enthroned in my heart. I kept reading or advancing my courses in this beautiful ministry, applying each and every one of them in my life! My husband was surprised because there had been many times that he had come home, and instead of finding an ogre, he found a soft and gentle wife who treated him with love without reproaching him with anything, and his astonished face was so pretty! My Beloved made me enjoy joy when he showed me the face of my EH.

When my HH was going to drink, he came drunk he attacked me horribly with insults and shouts, and he became like a demon (he never shouted at me the time of all our marriage), but His pain was so strong. When that happened, I prayed in silence without making any gesture, I just said to my HH, you defend me, you protect me, please cast out that demon that is inside my EH, and give peace to my heart, and it did not happen not even 10 minutes, and my EH fell asleep. In the days following these situations, he saw me act normal, attentive and kind, and HH ministered his heart and my EH came to apologize for the bad treatment he had with me. He told me that he wanted to forget and forgive me. My Beloved always helped me in the most difficult moments, He never left me alone.

I remember that I asked HH to change the mind of my EH to love Him first, and with that love if it was his will (of HH) to love me again, not to love me without first loving Him. Then I had also asked my EH for permission to take my youngest son to church, and my EH told me, don't take my son or know what you're going for! Then I was very sad and I said to my Beloved HH, I will not say anything to EH again, I will go to church when you put it in his heart to ask me and take me by the hand. OH LORD those words were blunt to me HH! It was not long and my HH fulfilled that request.

My EH met his cousin, who is pastor of a church near our house, and told him about what GOD did in his life. And a few days (a day of trouble at my brother's house), we went for a walk to distract ourselves from the problem so ugly that there was between my brother and his wife. The cousin of my EH wrote to him and said I will wait for you this afternoon at a special meeting in our church, and MY EH told me, my cousin invited me to his church, come on? That was one of the most incredible days that my Beloved HH gave me!! I said okay and he took me by the hand and we entered the church. WOW, how wonderful my BELOVED is, that was the point at which my EH felt in his heart the need of GOD, when his family worshiped HH no matter what was going on around him.

When my EH went to the courses to attend a men's retreat, he felt that he should pray. He told me that GOD woke him up at dawn, and he didn't understand what was happening. He just prayed, when he was on his way to retirement, there was much opposition, traffic had not passed through the streets, and he felt stunned by it. During the retreat my EH says that I felt that I needed to heal many wounds, and when he left there, he came to a different church. They invited him to give his testimony and it was all the glory for my HH because he declared that he loved the Lord. They made us take our family to the stage, incidentally, I had attended the women's retreat and by coincidence they invited me to give my testimony too. Our family was there, my children my EH and I, and he asked me for forgiveness. He exalted me in public, saying that thanks to my testimony, he was there and that he did not understand how in the midst of everything he had treated me, how the love of God was reflected in me. I cried a lot of joy, we we hugged and we apologized!! We told you that only our BELOVED can restore families!! It was a beautiful day!!

I was only shocked with everything my BELOVED did! 3 promises the same day:

"Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." Matthew 6:33

"Those who sow in tears shall reap with joyful shouting. He who goes to and fro weeping, carrying his bag of seed, shall indeed come again with a shout of joy, bringing his sheaves with him." Psalm 126:5-6

Dear Reader, for God nothing is impossible, at present my husband is a pastor of teenagers and a minister of praise. I help him with the teenagers and my daughter accompanies him in the ministry of praise. Currently my EH no longer drinks and ministers to his friends (drinkers) to seek God. Every day, he lives depending on our Beloved HH, guides my children with the word and instruction of HH. We live days of peace and much love as a couple and as parents, my Beloved transformed and saved not only me, he saved my EH, and my children with His immense love!!! Never get tired, HH always works, we must not despair! Just pray incessantly, be obedient and believe even if we see nothing!

~ Ziva in Perú
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